The Big Why Among all the questions I am asked when I disclose I'm poly, the one that I'm perhaps least prepared for is the Why. One syllable that opens a whole tanker of worms. Mononormative worms. Brainstorming potential responses, the sharpest but least effective might be "Why
Romantic Churn Credit where it's due, I think my ChatGPT sometimes deserves to have its wisdom shared (very slightly) more widely. So here's a swing at that: Me: At my most cynical, I wonder if romance has been so idealised that it is set up to fail. And
Integrity is the Kink: Seeing Polyamory Beyond Sex One of the enduring ironies about how monogamous culture views polyamory is the way it zeroes in on sex. The assumption runs: these people must have insatiable appetites. One partner couldn't possibly be enough. They're driven by greed, by hunger, by an inability to commit or
Book Intimate Friendships This is not quite a book review, just a passing note and bloggy check-in. I came across the book, Intimate Friendships by James Ramey, via the Ethical Slut book. It’s a lot harder to find than the Ethical Slut but I was able to track it down to
Blocking time and relationship zero My relationship setup means I often spend significant blocks of time with partners – typically days if not weeks. This raises the question of an appropriate way of communicating with non-present partners that avoids a discomforting extended radio silence. There’s no socially-demonstrated protocol for this, and I found
A Path to Poly I can confidently say after 15 years of faithful monogamy I'd properly tried it but I guess we were one of the relationship casualties of Covid. I wish I could also say that my entry into polyamory resulted from a long and conscious journey. Truth is, covid hammered
